The young adult retreat
that my husband and I led this year was life transforming for many that
attended. Our focus for this year was the parable of the Four Soils. We taught
on each one – dug into it, picked it apart and talked about how to apply it to our
lives. I taught about the soil that doesn’t last because of not having strong
roots. How do we grow spiritual roots that are strong enough so that we can
stand when the troubles of life hit us and want to knock us down?
Mt 13:20-21
The one who received the seed that fell
on rocky places is the man who hears
the word and at once receives it with
joy. But since he has no root, he
lasts only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because
of the word, he quickly falls away.
God says that there will
be persecution. He doesn’t say “if”, he says “when”. In other cultures it looks
like prison, being physically beaten, killed, etc. It’s quite severe compared to
what most of us experience here in the United States. For us it looks more like
being rejected by our friends or family. They don’t want to hangout with us
because of our relationship with Jesus. We may be mocked, bullied or talked
about you behind our back. It can be painful.
Don’t be surprised when people misunderstand,
criticize or even try to hurt (mentally, emotionally, physically) you because
of what you believe and how you live. Don’t give up. God is the only one you
need to please. He is the only one you need to answer to.
God also promises that we
will face trouble in this life. It’s not the same for everyone. I’ve
experienced enough trouble in my life to satisfy me for a lifetime. Life is
hard. For some people it’s harder than others.
Almost 14 years ago when
my family and I were in a head-on collision while going 65mph my life changed
forever. My husband died which means that I instantly became a single mom to
three children. One became a paraplegic because of a spinal cord injury. Life
got full of trouble in a split second. I had no warning. I was blindsided by
tragedy and trauma.
How was I able to stand
while going through all of this? I was able to stand because of my spiritual root
system being strong. I was blessed with an amazing support system of family and
friends that helped hold me up and survive.
I have to say that it was
in large part it was because of choices that I had made through previous years
that helped me to have a root system that was strong enough to help me not fall
over and die.
Some of the choices in my
life that help my roots to get even stronger:
· I changed friends – when I got serious about my
relationship with Jesus I needed to find new friends who loved Jesus too.
· I stopped drinking alcohol completely – almost 20
years ago God told me to stop drinking alcohol completely. This helped my relationship
with Jesus grow like nothing else.
· Went to retreats and conferences – spending time with
friends over a weekend or a few days who were pursuing God in the same way was
encouraging.
· Chose to fast – there is nothing like fasting and
sacrificing a desire in order to pursue and connect with all that God has for
me.
· Spent one-on-one time with Jesus – oh how this changes
a person!
· Pursued heart healing – I am not the same person I was
20 years ago because of this. The truth of Jesus is life-changing!
· Spent time in solitude and silence – time away from
the busyness of life is refreshing and a great time of reconnecting with Jesus.
· Learned to listen to God’s voice and chose obedience –
Nothing changes a person like this does. You want strong roots? Do this!
What do we do to
strengthen your spiritual root system?
There are 3 significant
things that we can do to grow our root system.
The three rules of the
dysfunctional family are: don’t feel, don’t talk and don’t trust. All of these
stunt our growth in every way.
I’m going to go through
each of these but today I will only talk about “don’t feel”.
We need to allow ourselves
to feel our emotions. Going numb or silent is not the answer.
We cannot
selectively numb emotions, when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the
positive ones. – Brene Brown
We tend to jump into being
busy and simply choose to shut down our feelings because it’s too painful.
Quite frankly, who wants to feel pain when we can avoid it? But is it really
gone when we don’t feel it? It’s still there. Pushing it down doesn’t make it
go away. Numbing our sadness, depression, grief, and anger may make us “feel
better” but reality is that we are also numbing the gratitude and happiness
that we could be feeling. Avoiding the pain also means that we avoid the joy
that can come with facing it head-on.
God created feelings. God
has feelings just like we do.
John 11:33-36
Jesus saw her weeping,
and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in
spirit and troubled. “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they
replied. Jesus wept. Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!”
Jesus’ friend died and his
sister’s were sad and grieving. Jesus grieved and wept with them. He felt what
they felt.
Psalm 86:15
But you, Lord, are a compassionate
and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.
Compassion, (righteous) anger and love.
God feels them all.
He feels pain just like we do. If he
created feelings then we should be open to them, right? God never creates
anything that is bad. He creates all that is good. It’s just a matter of how we
handle what he gives us.
Our feelings are real. It’s good to
feel them. Yesterday I took a day of letting myself feel the pain that I’ve
been working through. It was hard but I know that pushing through and getting
to where I am today is worth it. I spent some one-on-one time with Jesus and
listened to Him at 5:00 this morning and he spoke healing truth to me. I keep
attending to those roots.
Pursuing strong spiritual roots means
being diligent. It means making choices that most people wouldn’t normally
make. It may mean sacrifice. It may mean doing the hard stuff.
Are you willing to feel things that
you’ve pushed down for days, weeks or even years?
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